Why Cows Make Great Pets

July 29, 2010 by  
Filed under All Crazy Ideas, Plain Crazy Ideas

Dogs, cats, goldfish and gerbils may make good pets but they are too ordinary.  Dolphins need too much care and elephants are just too noisy.  Cows, on the other hand are rather unique and productive pets.

I know that having a cow as a pet presents certain challenges.  Cows eat allot, they don’t potty train easily (or at all), they take up allot of space, they moo loudly, and many city ordinances don’t allow you to have them at your house.  Cows often wake up crabby in the morning and they are notoriously messy eaters.  Cows don’t like to fetch the morning paper, and even if they did they probably won’t fit through the door of your house.

On the positive side having a cow will offer you advantages other pets can’t.  Cows produce milk so you won’t have to buy milk any longer.  They eat your grass so you won’t have to mow your lawn anymore (if you haven’t planted corn in place of your lawn yet).  Cows scare away burglars (would you rob the person crazy enough to have a cow tied up in their front yard?).  And best of all cows do not ever participate in, or sing along with the chicken dance.


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